Love or nothing?

Breakups are tough..Some part of you dies every time! Is it actually worth that much?

Exposing your self, getting hit at the very position where it will last! Why bother getting attached every-time?

Why do material things like EGO self respect matter the most? Is love extinct? or just the right one too vulnerable?? Will two right souls make “ALWAYS & FOREVER” or give up hoping that there is more!

How many number of failed relationships does one need to undergo before walking down the isle? What are the benchmarks one needs to set!

What are the signs one needs to observe?

Loving someone such a impossible word?

Perhaps, After a glass of coffee and hours of realisation later i finally managed to pick my notebook and pen all of it down, All the questions my eyes carried! Maybe some people are not meant for love. We are the ones which either teach people how to love or hurt them!

Being with one who needs you or to be with the one you need! What marks the submissive or dominating nature of the relationship!! Two people in love equal or joke?

The bad part is after so much.. Tears are not shedding. Its all inside.Will I ever love again?Silence is all I have.

May be the idea of True love a myth! It is the time to say no to all the novel stories that depict love! Infatuation, instant liking..One night stand..Emotional connect are the words to describe today’s scenario.Purity and innocence were lost in the stone age. Yet I do manage to get few cheesy chapters for my autobiography!

#Whenhetaughtiwasfakingit  That was the time i was being me.. He had misjudged to a level where fake me sounded so real. Yes i was attached because i was fooled by the tears…by the gestures…I believed it will last..!

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Resistance..

why cant i see it??

he doesn’t need me any more.. 

i am still trying to hang onn..

still pulling the strings…wishing that may be.. I will get him back?

 Am i so coward to see the reality??

the truth is knocking the door..

all i have to do is just open the door and let it pass!

will i be able to handle?

Till when i will live in dream?

sky is blue….not because god painted it blue! because blue is reflected!

We get peace while sitting at the sea shore not because the water is serene & life giver..

because we see our life passing it..we compare it to water…we see our biggest heart breaks hitting us like waves!

Nature teaches us every lesson for  which a counselor is paid for!

wHY CAN’T i see the rejection?

he has cleared but i still see hopes?

why?

because like all love stories i wish to write perfect ending to our story?

but why am i so dumb!

i have walked away from everything that could make me feel real?

why have i become like this?

am i so much in love?

i know i break …but why am i hurting myself more &more?

why do i remember him in every thing?

in every thing that happens around?

why have i become so dependent??

i never saw positive side of anything?

and in this case i am so positive??

enough! i have to leave this!

i have to take it out..i cant walk with heavy heart any more!

i have to let it goo…….

i have to just let it pass!

i have to let the sand sweep away i cant just let it hung on..

i have to let it goo!!

 

Turmoil..

Why darkness gives peace?                                                                   Why graves are kept in darkness yet peace is pictured as white illumination?                                                                                           Why wind takes away everything…….? yet it is shadowed as a good thing, it is seen as onset of monsoon or something beneath which has life..why not turmoil?                                                                                     Why does heart says what eyes can’t,  betrayed the heart says but eyes stay shut!                                                                                                 Eyes see sunshine and hope, heart says it is all shadowed                     Eyes see chocolates and roses, heart says thorns and bushes               Eyes see happiness and contentment, heart says darkness                 Eyes see positive air,heart says turmoil! Darkness hides everything in its warmth but still do we prefer sun for warmth?                                     Ever sat on the see shore?? The waves will talk to you & teach you what all textbooks can’t!  “GO ON WITH THE WIND, THE WIND WILL GUIDE”

Mami………….

the best which defines u..is “mmmmmmoooooooooommmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm”

A pocket of joy,love&care!

A true well-wisher..coolest friend…cutie pie!! ❤ ❤ :-*

When their is no hope, u come to us and teach us a better way to look at…the brighter sideImage

A last bye…

Every morning i wake up thanking each day that passes in peace.

Every morning gives me a new topic to describe about.

life is beautiful& so are the fellow creatures.

we all vary differently& we are grouped in two: Men&Woman.

Men are further known as  son,father,brother,husband,lover.

Women are further known as daughter,mother,sister,wife,beloved.

woman are the carrier of the future.

beholding & grooming…

woman is the symbol of love,serenity and power,

she holds the love for every child on earth,one such women was Mother Teresa.

but she can still fight with all the odds for his child, she is described as immaculate conception in bible.

the mother of the living god.”MOTHER MARY”

she was wife of a ordinary man, who was chosen to give birth to the incarnation,

but she had to answer the unknown.

she is  observed smiling & looking towards sky.

we pray to her for showering us with her love& she still smiles.

Mother’s smile is the most beautiful gift.

One such smile is counting her breathes..

unable to talk, unable to sense.

she lies in I.C.U fighting with the liver cancer, mother of a 6 year old fades away with each passing second.

they say that she is on the terminal stage.

but she fighting with in….

fighting with the demon, not to take her away.

she has said in her quickening voice” i will die….!!!!”

but to her sister she is still the same, the girl fighting with her for her toys.

and today she can’t even recognize her elder sister.

we hope that she returns..atleast share her heart out…but she is quiet..she is fadding away.!

her child sitts next to her & calls out “mumma?”

but she dosn’t answers.

today she can’t even answer her own belonging.

the child asks his father “what has happend to her?”

he can’t explain..

she is hanging there may be for her child..because he was separated from her from past 15 days..

but now..why doesn’t she gets up??

or just bid a good bye..

why doesn’t she end her suffering????

come back  “beta..calls out her  mother” .

why is  she quiet like moonlight?

GOD..why are you  making her suffer so much?

we are here to share her  sorrow.. atleast give her voice back!

many life’s have survived this disease then why is this disease engulfing her?

she is so tender..a pure soul…!

why only her?

people do hawan for her..but no effect!

why does it seems likes that god is not their for help?  ?

if she has to go ..let her go in peace..not in pieces!!!!

i was walking alone in the desert…

I was walking in the desert…..

Hoping that u were by my side……

But then I realized that  it was only me & the mirage…

False hope…..was all i was surrounded by…

hope that you will love me back…….

but…u  never did return….

I tried hard to walk along you….but my baby steps couldn’t catch u..

I cribbed,i wepped, i din’t slept for nights  together…hoping for a better tommorw

Every morning i  used wake up….hoping that

“no matter how dark the night is…..the day is always brighter”

I tried hard to ignore the fact that it was only  your mirage that was there not you…

i was ready to believe that  you are sitting next to me…..but!

i had to believe that u made a joke of me…

that one day i have to end it..

i had  to end this for myself…because it was only & myself that was loving..

i hoped that one day, u will come to me& say that I LOVE YOU…but i dint get this moment to share with u…

it was me walking alone in the desert..

stock-footage-woman-feet-walking-on-the-desert

hoping that one day our time  turns out to be a good time!

but! at last i had to accept it..

i had to end it..

i had to tell my self..that yes…u never lov

ed me…

our 8 months time together was a mistake..

mistake committed by both us together..

but repercussions handled by one…

what did i expect from you..>?

just loving  the child i was…respecting the lady i was..

but u did none..

and now i am on the verge of ending it all…

holding a piece of paper&tears in my eyes..

telling my self that it dint work…

tears are searching for a reason…that

why are these precious diamonds rolling down my cheeks?

my shadow is asking me….what has  bothered me so much..

is that my love for u was so self less that it dint deserved few words in return…

or was it my incomplete womanhood that w

as bothering..

i failed as women…as a lover..as belover….i failed..

i couldn’t expect my defeat….!

but….

..

I was walking in a desert…..

side of a window pane i sit….recalling the best times we had..

how into each other we were..

but..

then I remember the day when u said u never loved me…

i felt ..i could  run back to the beautiful moment i shared….

i was escaping the truth..

hoping that it may change..

but..

I was walking in a desert.!

first

The decision to follow your dream or the path which is walked by many….

To walk the road less traveled, or being the one to lead the change….the question  is small but the consequences are many..

They say that “EVERY CHANGE THAT HAS ENLIGHTENED THE EARTH WAS OPPOSED BY MANY”

images

but at the end it happened & was observed by all..

the inner conscious keeps on reminding that you are not the one that you are trying to be,ever since you were born…your first lesson was that “DON’T STRIVE TO BE SOMEBODY IN CROWD….STRIVE TO BE THE ONLY ONE IN CROWD”…..BEING A COMMONER IS EASY,BUT BEING A UNIQUE ONE IS DIFFICULT.

Then how can I convince myself that you have to be a engineer and not a artist..you don’t have a talent…you are just somebody..how can i say myself that you are going to be good engineer..when you know that by saying so you are cheating your self…you can wear that mask for many, but not the mirror in which you look every morning…you weep in tears you curse yourself but little do you know that you are only one that has the power to undo the things…you are the one who will put either the lightning in  your path or the stones…but for every step that you take u either get near to your goal or step away from it…….

“BE PATIENT & FOLLOW THE DIRECTION OF WIND…”

but don’t loose hope in the end..because what happens, happens for good!!!!!!!!!